12 is an even number. Even as we mathematicians assume it. All maths is assumption with logic. The day started with a different kind of emotional turmoil. After 8 insomniac nights I was able to have a proper sleep pattern. Amman bashed me, saying that it is the lack of isha prayers which is responsible for the insomnia and night mares.
The only thing I could remember in the morning was the fact that I sobbed last night on amman shoulder.
There was a temptation in morning to pick up the phone and hear his voice on other line and then there was a voice in my brain. Grow up girl.
But we never grow up some times. We try to behave as grown ups.
8,7,6,5 3 steps to left and 4 to right, my aerobic instructor was almost screaming on her highest pitch. It was fourth week in her class.
The first 2 weeks were a torture. People who do weight training do not have good heart rate.
And after the class I was thinking that I have behaved like a weight trainer in life as well. I have always taken the pain and stress in a go thinking that with time it will lose its own intensity. Not realizing that when we suffer, the scars are permanent.
Even though the pain does yield in positive returns at some end of life but the pain do convert into a change and some times damage to human body.
But again I better not be thankless. Life has bestowed me more than I have wanted in life. And yes there is a long way ahead.
But it hurts, it definitely does.
It is an ego war and my ego is bigger than this whole North American continent.
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